Family and Education
In order to increase the individual and social life quality, all human beings need education from the very first time they come to the world. Even though people can improve themselves, they definitely need someone else to get an education. The most significant education occurs in the family because family is a fundamental type of education. Therefore, together with the importance of education, it is significantly important to talk about the role of the family in education.
All of the general and personalized learning-teaching processes that teach people the art of living in the best way is called education. The training aims to change the behavior of the individual in a deliberate manner and for a purpose according to the pre-determined principles.
Intelligence is not the only factor influencing success in education. What is important is the ability to use intelligence in the right jobs effectively. At this stage, the personality traits and habits of the individual come into play. This is quite important; it is a sensitive issue.
Studies show very clearly that 65% of the children's personality development is in the 0-6 age range. This research re-emphasizes the importance of the family in the child's personality development.
But what kind of effects does the family have on children?
In the preschool period, the education and interest of the child from the family is of high importance. The positive attitudes of the family in the 0-6-year-old preschool (kindergarten) period and the conscious raising of their children turn into sustainable success in the school period. On the contrary, it is known that children with problems have failed in school life. Children with personality and behaviour disorders can have adaptation problems when they start school.
A child, who has always been spoiled by family members and who has always been wanted, has difficulty accepting that all his wishes cannot be fulfilled when he starts school. The child, who has to face reality at once, can show anger, aggression or vice versa.
Such behaviors can lead to social exclusion or various psychological pressures. Confronted with such a situation, the child may experience loss of self-confidence, discomfort from the environment and a desire to move away. Therefore, from school and lectures, cooling, lack of interest, escaping and as a result, academic failures can occur. As you can see, education is always intertwined with internal and external elements.
One of the most common mistakes made by parents is that they do not treat their children as individuals. Not accepting children as individuals can also cause parents to find their children’s behaviors strange and wrong even if they are not. In this case, the child is not his/her character; we try to win the character of ourselves. In this case, what we do is to personalize our children with our characters, not their personal characters. Moreover, we interpret this as a kind of education. Such an educational method will have a negative impact on academic life as it may lead to personality problems in the child. Beware, not to interfere with misconduct; emphasizes the need to avoid unnecessary interventions.
- Being overly anxious and seeing the outside world as a complete threat for the child adversely affects the social development of the child. In particular, preventing the socialization of the child. However, a human being is a social being and needs to be social. The social development of the child is an important issue for success in education.
- Parents, who have not been able to fulfill their dreams, wish their children to achieve those dreams and this is a huge mistake in itself. For example, we often see a father who wants to be a lawyer or a father who is constantly directing his/her child to advocacy or similar examples. Each individual has its own characteristics and interests. Children are individuals and their interests should be explored and healthy directions should be made.
- It is also not right to leave indifferent, to show lack of affection and to leave everything under control of the child. Parents should check whether their children are fulfilling their responsibilities. Both pre-school and school-age children should be looked after and assisted. Homework can be checked, co-educational activities can be done, tasks can be helped and samples can be reproduced in this way.
- It is not correct to compare children with friends/peers. If a comparison is to be made, the development of the child should be done to assess whether everything is in order. The benchmarking should not be based on a person but on the general peers. In addition, the child does not need to be aware of this comparison. Each child's interest and personality is different. As long as you compare it to someone else, it will be a mistake to wait for it to happen.
- Finally, it is one of the biggest mistakes that the family members do not question themselves in failures.
While describing the mistakes above it was mentioned about what is the correct thing to do against these mistakes. The new subjects that indicate the prevalence of the family in the education of the child and what needs to be done:
- Children's psychosocial development (social-emotional development) should be followed and informed. According to Erickson's psychosocial development theory, each age has developmental goals and developmental conflicts. Erickson, who divides human life into 8 phases in terms of psychosocial development, argues that the conflicts must be successfully resolved in each phase. Unresolved emotional conflicts of any period will be reflected in the next period and will turn into personality problems until they find a solution. The importance of the family in this regard comes to the fore.
- The child should be able to live his childhood. The approaches like “You are a grown up now, you are a man and you are not a child!” are not educational, but they are frustrating. Children should play, move, make small clumsiness, touch the stone to the soil, dirty the head and live their childhood. It is especially advocated by all child development experts that games are the most important tool for intelligence development in children.
- The importance or role of the family in the development of the child is not limited to the practices on the child. Providing a peaceful family environment to the child significantly affects both educational life and personality development. It is necessary not to argue with the child or to exert physical or emotional violence. Aside from shouting at the child, family members shouting at each other even if the child's mental health will the provision of a peaceful environment is very important.
- The more developed the ability of family members to understand each other, to interpret their behaviors, to perceive their wishes and expectations, the more the communication ability of the child will develop. Communication skills are not only in academic education; is an important skill that gives an individual an advantage in every aspect of life. Admit your children unconditionally and judge for good communication with the child. In this way, the tendency and favorability of positive behaviors will increase.
The importance of education is based on the necessity of improving the quality of life of the human and the development of a more livable world. The importance of the family is based on the fact that it is the basis of a good education.
Families must be educated and conscious to raise a successful, intelligent, creative child. Education should be able to master important changes and prepare children for the future with appropriate tools. Because the children we raise will be parents of tomorrow, the importance of education should never be forgotten regardless of age.